Over lunch today, I got to thinking about moving out into my own apartment. (It's such an exciting thought!) I thought about getting my bed out of storage - ooh, and my giant desk! And the other half of my DVD collection! And the other 3/4 of my books! - and I thought about the things that I would need to get and how much fun it would be to go shopping for home furnishings without having to try to blend my decorating taste with that of someone else.
And then I suddenly thought about actually living alone. I thought about those weekends when I don't have anything planned. What would I do? Would I sit at home all weekend, watching movies and eating ice cream, or working on one of my many little projects? Never speaking unless someone happens to call...
No, of course not, I tried to tell myself. You've been home alone many weekends before. Just because you have a roommate doesn't mean they're always around. Just call up some of your friends and go do something!
And then I tried to decide who I would call.
There was not a single name that popped instantly to my mind.
Back in the midwest, I always had someone I could call. My Swedish friend was always up for fun and frivolities (as she called it), and if she wasn't available, there was my old roommate or the library girl or my friend from work - just for starters.
Out here in California, though, the list is much shorter.
Oh sure, there are people that I could call. When I stopped and really thought about it, I came up with plenty of people who might be willing to hang out on a random Saturday. The problem is that I've never before called most of them with a spontaneous invitation to do something on a weekend, and I'm not sure how they would react.
Okay, that's just my fear talking. I've been telling myself over and over for the last six months that if I want to make friends, I have to put myself out there and make myself available for friendship. I think I've done a pretty good job of it, too. I just forgot that the next step is actually following up on some of those connections - inviting people to hang out and really trying to get to know them. I can't expect to get all of my social interaction through work or church. I have to make a little one-on-one effort, too.
It was an eye-opening train of thought.
Actually, I also had an eye-opening conversation last night. My mom and I were having dinner with some family friends, and the husband was encouraging me to look into getting my Master's degree, since I would get free tuition from working at a university. He was telling me about his job in career development at a different college, and how much he loves working with students to help them figure out what to major in and where to go after graduation. I almost hate to admit it, but I was interested! I love it that my job lets me work with college students, and I get to do a little - a very little - bit of academic advising with them, and I like it. So I think I could be interested in that career development thing he was talking about.
But . . . I would love to be self-employed. I'd really love to run a business with a friend or two - and I have my ideas - and some of my friends have ideas, too. And having that as a career goal doesn't really mesh with getting a post-grad degree and working up through the university system.
On the flip side, I've always felt like it's the kind of career goal that I would have to fall into, rather than actively pursue. Which leaves me needing a regular job in the interim.
Wow - that's a lot of stuff to be percolating around in my head! (Especially over a weekend!)
I think I'll finish cleaning the studio now...
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Return of Curly Girl
Um . . . hi.
I'm still here. Four months later.
Sorry about the silence.
I've been working at the university for four months now. It's just as good as I thought it would be - easily one of the best jobs I've had since college. But by the time I get home, eat dinner and recover from a long day of work, the last thing I want to do is sit on a hard wooden chair in the hallway next to the living room and type on my mom's computer. Sad but true.
However, I'm finally starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel, and the hope that I will be moving out into my own apartment soon has given me the stamina to say hello once again. Feel free to celebrate.
I made that sound like my life has been miserable for the last few months, didn't I? Life has been pretty good, actually. It's just that I'm still living with my mom. I was hoping to be out of here long before now. (It look a little longer than I expected to save up a decent chunk of change.)
In some ways, my life is limited because I live with my mom. I can't really have people over. (You'd understand if you saw the place and the hidden garden surrounding it.) I can't always do what I want after work because most of my things are in storage on the other side of the city. I can't even really cook for myself in her kitchen. It is the tiniest kitchen that I have ever seen, and I've seen some small ones!
There are some good things, too. Like having a roommate. Once I move out, I'll go home to an empty apartment every night. I'll have to call people if I want to chat. I'll have to kill spiders by myself.
On the plus side, I'll be able to host that small group that I've been thinking about. I'll be free to read in bed until horribly late without someone checking to see why my light is still on. I'll do my own grocery shopping and cook what I want for dinner each night. I'll get my things out of storage.
Yes, there are many good reasons to move out of my mom's house!
In keeping with my Curly Girl resolutions, I've been thinking about NaNoWriMo.
What is NaNoWriMo, you ask? It stands for National Novel Writing Month. It's a non-profit based in Oakland. Each November, they sponsor a worldwide challenge, asking their members to write a 50,000 word novel in one month. Just for the heck of it. Just to help spark creativity. Just to be able to say that you wrote a novel.
I think I'm going to do it this year.
Actually, I've been thinking about doing my own month in May. I'm excited about it, and I don't want to wait until November to start. I've always said that I'd write a novel someday, and I'm afraid that if I wait, I might not do it. But if I try to write one in May - maybe only 30,000 words, since I'll be totally on my own for it - then I'd have more motivation to do one again in November.
Don't worry - I'm not expecting to write anything very good in May! One of the motto's of NaNoWriMo is "Quantity, not quality." They argue that sometimes it's better to force yourself to write an entire book, even if it's trash. If you try to write a perfect book the first time around, you'll block yourself. But 50,000 words of trash will still give you the thrill of writing a novel, and it might be redeemable in the editing process.
I'm ready to change the subject now, but I have nothing to say. This is one of the hazards of trying to write after an eight hour day of work.
And beyond that, I just realized that I'm hungry.
I'm still here. Four months later.
Sorry about the silence.
I've been working at the university for four months now. It's just as good as I thought it would be - easily one of the best jobs I've had since college. But by the time I get home, eat dinner and recover from a long day of work, the last thing I want to do is sit on a hard wooden chair in the hallway next to the living room and type on my mom's computer. Sad but true.
However, I'm finally starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel, and the hope that I will be moving out into my own apartment soon has given me the stamina to say hello once again. Feel free to celebrate.
I made that sound like my life has been miserable for the last few months, didn't I? Life has been pretty good, actually. It's just that I'm still living with my mom. I was hoping to be out of here long before now. (It look a little longer than I expected to save up a decent chunk of change.)
In some ways, my life is limited because I live with my mom. I can't really have people over. (You'd understand if you saw the place and the hidden garden surrounding it.) I can't always do what I want after work because most of my things are in storage on the other side of the city. I can't even really cook for myself in her kitchen. It is the tiniest kitchen that I have ever seen, and I've seen some small ones!
There are some good things, too. Like having a roommate. Once I move out, I'll go home to an empty apartment every night. I'll have to call people if I want to chat. I'll have to kill spiders by myself.
On the plus side, I'll be able to host that small group that I've been thinking about. I'll be free to read in bed until horribly late without someone checking to see why my light is still on. I'll do my own grocery shopping and cook what I want for dinner each night. I'll get my things out of storage.
Yes, there are many good reasons to move out of my mom's house!
In keeping with my Curly Girl resolutions, I've been thinking about NaNoWriMo.
What is NaNoWriMo, you ask? It stands for National Novel Writing Month. It's a non-profit based in Oakland. Each November, they sponsor a worldwide challenge, asking their members to write a 50,000 word novel in one month. Just for the heck of it. Just to help spark creativity. Just to be able to say that you wrote a novel.
I think I'm going to do it this year.
Actually, I've been thinking about doing my own month in May. I'm excited about it, and I don't want to wait until November to start. I've always said that I'd write a novel someday, and I'm afraid that if I wait, I might not do it. But if I try to write one in May - maybe only 30,000 words, since I'll be totally on my own for it - then I'd have more motivation to do one again in November.
Don't worry - I'm not expecting to write anything very good in May! One of the motto's of NaNoWriMo is "Quantity, not quality." They argue that sometimes it's better to force yourself to write an entire book, even if it's trash. If you try to write a perfect book the first time around, you'll block yourself. But 50,000 words of trash will still give you the thrill of writing a novel, and it might be redeemable in the editing process.
I'm ready to change the subject now, but I have nothing to say. This is one of the hazards of trying to write after an eight hour day of work.
And beyond that, I just realized that I'm hungry.
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